So you have the dull face, grey sky, low energy countenance and feelings of doom and gloom? Want to change that to a great feeling of power and happiness in less than a minute?
According to researchers Kenneth Sheldon and Sonja Lyubomirsky, happiness doesn’t come easily. But, you can change your feelings from miserable to joyful in moments.
There are two type of personal change; Circumstantial and Intentional.
Circumstantial change is buying a new car, moving to a new location, winning the lottery. These are obviously not quick changes. Intentional change requires much more effort, such as finishing the Enterprising Cycle Level One series, or learning to fly an airplane, or to play an instrument. These take much more effort to accomplish than circumstantial change.
According to several studies, the reason that circumstantial change isn’t very good at modifying our happiness is that we adapt to the change very quickly. This is called “hedonistic habituation”. It’s the ‘ho-hum’ we feel after eating the same great meal 20 days in a row, or having sex with our wife 4 times a week for a decade. (what?!@)
Remember the ‘what’s different?’ example of the bar code from Session Three? Once we become familiar with an experience, our minds quickly wander off looking for the ‘tiger in the bush’. We continue scanning the jungle for the anomaly and take the rest for granted. Stare at the seven lines below. You can see how your eyes fixate or settle on the ‘missing’ line in the series. Mean while, your mind rushes off to another thought, rather than celebrating the abundance of the seven lines.
So, the new home, the new wife, the NEW ENTERPRISE, they all induce hedonistic habituation from which we tend toward boredom. Ho-hum.
n the other hand, we know from neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) and most behavioral psychology that ‘feelings follow behavior’. Laugh and dance, you feel happy. Slouch and isolate – you die. This brings me to the topic of this article. Given an entrepreneur’s incessant focus on fixing problems and solving puzzles, how can we induce happy feelings in less than a minute –
The answer?
Stick it!
Grab an ordinary pen or pencil. Stick it width-wise across your mouth, clenched by your front teeth so that your lips don’t touch the pencil. Hold that position for 15-30 seconds and you’ll begin to feel happier.
Try it.
Just in case you don’t believe me, and try ignoring the feelings, reverse the effect, and create feelings of sadness and anger by holding the pen/pencil with your lips rather than your teeth. Hold it for 15-30 seconds while recognizing what ‘feelings’ are created.
The trick is that when you hold the pencil with your teeth, you contract your facial muscles similar to a smile, and when you hold it with your lips, you imitate a frown. Try this yourself while looking at yourself in the mirror. You’ll see the expressions that give your feelings away.
My thanks to Richard Wiseman and his work in producing 59 Seconds – Think a Little, Change a Lot. It’s a marvelous read filled with examples like this. Order a copy for your mind AND your toolbox!
